Forever After
by Upfire
Summary: With that split blessed second, the coin came tumbling back through the air and down to Bud's outstretched hand. Their lives were changed irrevocably. The end . . . or not?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: lol, reposting this due to minor complications first time (I swear I uploaded this document, but I got something totally different. And I didn't even write it - HP, I think). **

**Intro**

**2132**

**McMurphy's Tavern**

**Mac's POV**

I watched with an almost paralyzing fixation as the coin soared up into the air. I could practically feel the mood in the room shift. What had once been almost carelessly alight with happiness, it was now tense and laden with anxiety. There was an almost paleness to Harriet's usually rosy cheeks as I watched her head tilt upwards to the uncontrollable coin. I could hear the sound of the wheels turning in Bud's head as his mind flew a mile a minute. The General's face was nearly unreadable, and in that split life-changing second, I found myself wondering what was going through his mind. Which one of us he wanted to win. Harm or me.

Harm.

I could feel my heart beat faster. This was it, the end. The end to the playful office banter, the end to the dance or the song or whatever the heck we've called it over the years. We were ending it, right now, right here, this very second. Almost as if sensing the emotional whirlwind that had overtaken my body, Harm's hand seemed to magnetically travel to mine. He squeezed it – not hard, just reassuring. He was there for me, that's what it said. He was there for me whatever the outcome would be. And for that one millisecond – the whip-quick moment before the coin tumbled back to the ground – I was grinning like a maniac.

_Whoosh._

The coin landed softly into Bud's outstretched palm, and he clamped it shut before anyone saw the outcome. His water blue eyes met with my chocolate brown ones. He was nervous, you could just tell. My mind flew back to the first year I met him, the raw beginning. I remembered his nervous pacing before exams, the almost light-headed blabbering that he would do to Harriet in their pre-marital days. But this was a different Bud, a wiser Bud. A Bud marked by the cruelty of war, branded by the wisdom of a husband/father, and it was he and his coin that would determine our fate today.

"Okay, guys, this is it . . ." Bud whispered shakily, and Harm – from beside me – flashed him a nervous smile. An encouraging smile. If I didn't know him so well, and it wasn't my hand that he was gripping abnormally hard, I might think he wasn't nervous. That he hadn't a care in the world which side the coin had landed, but I had always been able to read Harm extraordinarily well and I knew the truth. He was scared as hell, both of us were. I just didn't hide it nearly as well as he did.

"Three," I whispered strongly, my eyes connecting with Harm's and forming an instant bridge.

"Two," Harm responded with as much force as intention that I had.

"One," the people around us chorused and Bud released his other hand from the coin as if burned. I was drawn almost magnetically towards the coin, my eyelids shut closed in a sudden turn of fear. I was so mixed up, I was almost passive.

"Colonel," I heard Bud whispered and very slowly I opened my eyes, the world around me suddenly seeming a very rich color. Bud handed me the coin sort of shrugging his shoulders. "It was tails. The Captain won."

A low and deep silence suddenly drowned the room and I looked up to see six pairs of eyes staring at me intently, with an almost profound concern. It was kind of touching, if you thought about it. I looked up at Harm and realized that there was no flush of pleasure in his cheeks, no gleam of victory in his eyes. Only concern for me, and how I felt.

I cleared my throat, my voice seemingly stuck up at the top. I wrapped my arms around Harm's neck, and pulled myself up level to him (okay, I pulled him lower down to me) and grinned against his lips. "Congratulations."

And then the noise began. It was a half applause-half excited muttering mixture. I could just feel Harm's eyes on me, and I knew he was trying to read into me, but to be honest I had no clue what he would find. I didn't even know what I was feeling. I was numb, numb to emotion, numb to the world. All I kept thinking was _I'm not a Marine_, following by _I'm going to London, _and then finally _I'M MARRYING HARM – _the last point being a definite highlight.

Almost instantly after I released Harm from my embrace I was enveloped by Harriet. She squeezed me so hard I thought I would pop. "I knew you'd get together, I just knew it!" she was crying excitedly. She released, her bright blue eyes shining with an overwhelming amount of energy. "My god, Mac, you had me worried today!"

"Well, this was kind of unexpected," I said feelingly. Behind Harriet and I, the room was a jumble of chatter and other noises. "I mean . . . yeah," I trailed off nervously.

"So are you going to have the wedding in London?" Jen broke out from behind me. I turned around to see Harm staring at me intently, repeating Jen's question without words. Just his eyes. I shrugged my shoulders. He cocked his head. I rolled my eyes.

Harm grinned at me and then turned back to Jen. "Yes, we're having it in London."

From beside me Harriet squealed very femininely, my heart thumped rapidly. _Alright, _I thought almost desperately. _At any moment I can regain the feeling of my hands. _

"Okay, guys," Harm was speaking loudly over the din so we could all hear him. "It's been a long night – especially for Mac and I – and we have flights to catch tomorrow, so . . ." Harm sort of trailed off.

"We get the picture," Sturgis added to Harm before turning to the rest of the group. "Alright, everyone, clear out. Show's over, Harm and Mac are getting hitched."

"So elegantly put, Sturgis," I rolled my eyes.

"Well, what can I say?" Sturgis shrugged his shoulders defensively as he picked his jacket up off the bar stool. "When you've been carrying secrets so long, sometimes things just slip out not exactly the way you want them to sound."

"Alright, that's enough, Sturgis," I said through gritted teeth. I caught Harm's curious expression from behind me and mouthed 'I'll tell you later' to which I received a quick nod in response.

"Okay, I'll talk to you tomorrow," Harriet grinned, squeezing another hug out of me before she looped herself around Bud's shoulders and swept him out the door. Jen grinned sort of awkwardly at us, not quite sure what to do in the situation. Sturgis clapped Harm in a congratulatory way on the back, and the General shook both our hands. And then finally, we were alone.

Harm breathed slowly, his eyes fixed on mine. It took a split second for the flyboy smile to sweep his face. "Well, we're out of the eye of the public . . ." he whispered in a low voice. "Your place or mine?"

I just couldn't think. I stood there looking at the ground, this far off look capturing my eyes. An internal battle waged within me. On one hand, I was devastated to be leaving the Marine Corps, and on the other hand I was so ecstatic for Harm and I that I could barely speak.

"Hey," Harm whispered softly, touching his hand to my cheek. My eyes leapt up to his. "Are you okay with this? I mean, the decision didn't exactly go in your favor . . ."

"I'm fine," I avoided his eyes. Harm tilted my chin so our vision locked.

"Seriously, Mac, our lives just changed incomparably five minutes ago, you'd be inhuman if you didn't feel something," Harm said, sounding more like a proverb than he did himself. Slowly, he picked up my jacket and draped one side over my shoulders while he put on his jacket and we left the building.

"I . . . I know," I trailed slowly, as we walked along the sidewalk, close together for the warmth we really didn't need. "And I'm feeling a lot of things. I just don't know what they are yet. I'm kind of . . . numb," I stated bluntly, for lack of a better word.

Harm's eyes fell down to the ground. "Yeah, me too," he said after a while. "But I think I'm more excited then anything. Excited about everything. What's happened, what's happening, what's _going _to happen."

You could see the thrill in his eyes while he spoke too. The sky blue orbs that pierced the darkness around us were dancing with joy. I smiled and leaned on him as we walked, my head on his shoulder. "I'm excited too," I said finally. "I'm just more scared than anything, I think."

Harm stopped walking. "You're not . . . reconsidering, are you?"

"Oh, no," I said quickly. "God, no, Harm. I want to marry you. Honestly, I want that more than anything. I just didn't think all this would be so . . . _complicated. _I mean, I know if things were simple, this would have happened a long time ago. You and me. So I shouldn't be surprised, I'm NOT surprised, it's just . . . oh, I don't know. I'm babbling."

"If you feel better, it's worth it," Harm offered. He smiled at me, "Honestly, Mac, are you alright?"

I took a long breath of thought, my head leaving his shoulder so I could look at him properly. "No," I said slowly, and them smiled reassuringly at him. "But I will be."

Harm grinned at me, his arm relaxed to my shoulder. "Wow, this happened fast. I can't believe it did. I mean, we took so long just to . . . you know, get a move on. And then _this." _He stretched the last word to enormous magnitude.

"Hey," I grinned cheekily, "are YOU reconsidering?"

"No, no, no, no," Harm sped through quickly. His eyes flipped up to meet mine. "From this day to my death bed I will never reconsider this."

I exhaled lengthily and slowly, the weight of this moment falling heavily upon my shoulders. "The rest of our lives," I whispered almost incredulously.

"That's right," Harm repeated slowly and grinning. "The rest of our lives."

_TBC . . . _

**A/N: Please review. Reviews are inspiring (in other words, they inspire quicker writing)**


	2. Hopes Too High?

**A/N: Oh damn, lol. We debated for so long whether Mac called head or tails. It was a fifty fifty shot and we picked the wrong fifty. Oh well, let's just SAY she picked heads, okay? Besides, this is what fanfic's for anyway. Our own version of the story . . .**

**Hopes Too High?**

**0921 **

**Harm's Apartment **

**Mac's POV**

My eyes snap open, and the time immediately comes to my mind. I've slept in. Someone's arm is wrapped around my waist, and very protectively, I add. I carefully roll over, trying to get a good look at the man's face, but when I spot him, a smile finds it's way onto my face. Everything that's happened in the last 24 hours comes rushing back to me, and I'm overwhelmed for a second with emotions. But they leave me in peace, when his blue eyes meet mine, and he pulls me closer for a tender kiss.

Breathless, he pulls away from me, smiling. "Hey beautiful." he tells me.

I roll my eyes, and snuggle into his duvet. "Morning sailor."

I hear him chuckle, and I close my eyes contently. I can feel him sit up and get off the bed, as he heads over to the bathroom. While he's in there, I pop my eyes open, and take a look at his apartment. We're going to spend the rest of our lives together, in London. We're going to be happy. I sigh. Even if I'm not going to be in the Marine Corps anymore.

The shrill ring of his phone calls out to me through the house. Harm pokes his head out of the bathroom and gives me a smile. "Want to get that for me?"

I roll my eyes, letting out a small groan. As I lift the duvet, I can feel the warmth leave me almost instantly. I shiver, but stand up, and fold it over in an attempt to preserve it. I will be back for that.

I make my way down the stairs, the phone still screaming at me. Picking it up, I hold it to my ear. "Hello?" I say, groggily.

"Good Morning!"

I close my eyes, shaking my head at Harriet's chipper voice. I let out a loud groan. "Harriet, how long have you been up? It's not natural to be so happy."

"Yes, well, after having AJ, I realized that you have to make do with what you've given. And that goes for only 6 hours of sleep, too."

I sit down on the arm rest on Harm's big chair, and slide down onto the cushion, resting my head on the opposite arm rest. "Harriet, what can I do for you?"

"I just wanted to congratulate you and Harm again, before you go off to London, and I never see you again." she says, sadly.

And it hits me that I won't get to see some of my best friends whenever I want, as well as my godchildren. Other emotions are kept up inside of me, but it seems that one always stands out, and right now that's the sad part that I'll never get to see Harriet and the others whenever I can. We're going to be a whole world apart. "Harriet… We'll still get to talk all the time. We'll definitely keep in touch, and still get together once in a while." I reply. I know that the sadness in my voice is noticeable, but I hope that so is my certainty.

"Yes… we'll have to keep in touch. Email me everyday. I'll take lots of pictures of the kids to send to you and Harm."

"And don't think for a second that I won't hold you to that." I say, my voice breaking. I need someway of being able to spend more time with Harriet. Something that would buy us more time than the time we have left. "Harriet, do you think you could do me the honour of being my maid of honour at the wedding?" I was hers, and now she can be mine.

There's a silence at the other end. I frown. "Harriet? Harriet are y-"

"Yes!" Harriet cries happily. "I would love to Mac."

I smile, but before I can reply, Harm steps into the living room. "Hey, who's on the phone?" he asks.

I hold my hand over the receiver. "Harriet." I say quietly.

"Ask her if Bud's there."

"Harriet, is Bud there?" I ask. A few moments later, Bud is on the phone. "Yes ma'am?"

"Bud, Harm would like to talk to you. Do you have a minute?" I ask patiently.

Harm's blue eyes are twinkling, as he steps closer, and quickly snatches the phone from me. Before I can protest, his lips are on mine. Pulling away, grinning, he puts the phone to his ear, saying, "Bud, how are you?"

My hand lifts up to my lips, trying to stop the tingling. I glare after him, but he just smiles his smile at me. Damn sailor… But he is a _very_ good kisser, so that makes up for it. "Bud, how would you and Mikey like to be in the wedding? yea? Well, you'd be my Best Man, and Mikey's a good friend. He'll be an usher… O is that right…" he looks over at me, and I know that Bud just told him that Harriet's going to be my Maid of Honour.

"…We do need a flower girl and a few more ushers… and we'll need a ring boy… No Bud, I'm talking about _your _kids…" he rolls his eyes at Bud to me, and I let out a laugh. Bud can be so oblivious at times.

"Well, we'll have to stay for a another day now, I've rescheduled my first day of working, because of the wedding, and Mac needing to…" he glances over at me, and I know the words before he stops himself. I know that he doesn't want to say that I'm going to be resigning, because of what it'll do to me. "Well, I'd better go. Yes, see you later Bud." He hangs up the phone, and places it back on the charger.

I sit up, and he walks over to me. "Are you okay?" He asks me, with concern written all over his face.

I sigh. I don't know. I'm disappointed and I'm happy. I want to ball my eyes out, and let him hold me, because I'm going to miss being a Marine and a JAG lawyer so much, but I want to scream at the roof tops that I'm getting married. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for him. But what will I get to do? Become a housewife? I can barely cook a grilled cheese without burning it to death.

"I'm okay." I finally answer him. He down at me with his big blue eyes, still full of concern. For me. I know, I should be used to him showing his concern for me after nine years, but it's different this time. He's not holding anything back now. This time, he's looking at me like he's my fiancé, and I'm his. Like nothing in the world matters, except for my happiness.

He nods his head, but he doesn't believe me. I wouldn't believe me. But he turns back into the bedroom, dressed in only boxers, because he knows that I can take care of myself. He knows that if I come close to falling off the edge, he'll be right there to catch me, and he knows that I'll let him. I follow him up the small flight of stairs, and sit on the bed, while he goes through the suitcases in search of his clothes. "Harm, what am I going to do?" I ask, almost whispering.

He looks up from the found suitcase, and our eyes meet. There's a lingering silence, because neither of us knows how to answer my question. "Ma-"

I cut him off. "I mean, I can't exactly just look after our kids. You know my condition - I'm never going to be able to have kids. I'm not going to be able to become a housewife, you know how I cook. I may be neat and organized, but what about when you go to work? What am I supposed to do?" I ask him, my eyes still locked on his.

He leans over to me, and takes my hand. A shiver runs down my body, and I blink away tears. "Mac, we'll cross that bridge when we get there. But for now, stop comparing yourself to Harriet, and let's go through with this wedding. And stop predicting our future. You don't know that we won't have kids."

"Yes I do Harm! I told you exactly what the doctor told me." I say, my voice rising slightly.

He takes a more firm hold of my hand. "Mac, calm down. Let's just get married, and we'll discuss having kids later." I open my mouth to reply, but his fingertips lightly touch my mouth. "I mean it. We'll talk about it later. For now, we'll have to get your stuff from your place, and then we can go over to Bud and Harriet's place. Bud wants us to come for lunch to talk about the wedding."

His fingertips come away from my lips, and he replaces them with his. Breaking away, he goes back to his suitcase and pulls out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. "You'll have to wear your dress from last night, since I doubt you'll be able to fit into any of my clothes." he says, smiling at me.

* * *

**1303 **

**Robert's Residence **

**Harm's POV**

She gives me a smile, as I pull the 'vette to a stop on Bud and Harriet's driveway. I turn the engine off, and I watch her open the door and step out, stretching. We took the long route to Bud and Harriet's place, along the countryside for a short drive. It had been silent the whole time, but it was worth it just watching her. She needed to take a good half hour to sort out her thoughts, and I hope that drive has helped. She straightens her white blouse, and pulls down her blue jeans, before slamming the door shut.

I follow her up the white front porch, and we both take off our sunglasses - me tucking them into the breast pocket of my shirt, and her resting them on her hair, slightly pulling it back out of her face. She reaches over, and knocks on the door, before ringing the doorbell. It was our tradition with the family - it's how they knew it was us.

We can hear children's laughter, and I see a look of longing flicker across Mac's face. I reach over, and take her hand, giving it a short but reassuring squeeze. She looks up at me, gratefully, before the door flies open and Harriet looks at us, smiling. Her blonde hair is growing out, and it's left down to rest on her shoulders.

"C'mon in." she says, stepping aside to let us in.

We step in, and she shuts the door behind us. Before we even have time to say hello to Harriet, Jimmy comes running in, smiling his father's smile at us. I can remember the first time I saw Bud smile, and I must say, it brought a smile to my face. "Unca Harm!" he tells me, holding up his hands for me to pick him up.

"No you don't!" Harriet says, picking her son up quickly. She looks him in the eye. "You have to go and pick up those toys you so desperately wanted to play with."

Jimmy gives her a frown, before he squirms out of her grasp to the ground. He makes his way over to the living room, and Harriet shakes her head, sighing. "Boys…" she says under her breath, as she turns to us with another smile. "AJ and Bud are out back. AJ's helping Bud with the burgers, and veggie burgers." she smiles at me.

I smile at her, and I realize that I'm already missing the family who grew in front of our eyes. I nod, and make my way out back, leaving Harriet and Mac to talk some girl talk about the wedding. I close the screen door behind me, as I step up to the barbeque beside Bud, who's showing AJ how to flip the burgers. "There you go…"

"Hey Bud."

Bud turned around, smiling. "Hey sir."

"Hey there AJ." I greet AJ.

AJ looks up at me, after flipping a burger all by himself. He looks over at me, and smiles. "Hi Uncle Harm! I'm cooking lunch for us."

I laugh, and nod at him. "Good work AJ. Keep it up."

Bud turns to his son. "Okay, I'll call you when the burgers need to be flipped again. You go and see if your mother needs you to do anything."

The young boy sighs, before giving Bud a "yes" and moping off into the house. Bud shakes his head. "Did you want a beer, sir?" he asks me.

"I could use a cold one, Bud." I smile. Bud reaches down to the cooler and grabs two beers, handing me one. I take it, and twist the cap off with ease, letting the cool liquid down my throat. I really needed that. Setting the beer down, I look up at Bud. "So, have you had a chance to ask Mikey if he would be able to make the trip to London with us for the wedding?"

Bud nods and sets his beer down on the opposite side of the barbeque. "Yes sir, I have. He said he would love to join us."

* * *

**1324 **

**Robert's Residence **

**Mac's POV**

"Nikki Faith, stop moving so I can get your shirt on!" Harriet scolded the gurgling child.

I let out a small laugh, as I reach over and try to help Harriet put Nikki's arm's through the pink shirt. But Nikki seems to have other ideas, and begins to squirm even more. Finally, Harriet manages to reach over top of her head onto the top of the baby dresser, and shows Nikki a stuffed kitten. "If you're good for mommy, I'll let you have Kitty Kitty back."

And just like that, Nikki freezes, and allows Harriet and I to pull down her shirt and put her arms through. After Harriet picks Nikki off the dresser, and puts her down, she hands her daughter the stuffed kitten. Nikki plants a big kiss on the kitten's nose, and starts to crawl away. Harriet follows Nikki out of the room, and I follow both of them. Nikki is so adorable. I wonder what it would be like to have a daughter. I guess I'll never get that chance now, will I?

"So, what's going on with the wedding?" Harriet asks me, as she picks Nikki and the kitten up to go down the stairs.

I follow them down the stairs, wondering the exact same thing. All I know is that Harriet's going to be my maid of honour, Bud is going to be Harm's best man, Mikey's going to be an usher, Nikki the flower girl, and the boys will be the ring bearer and other ushers. I look over at Harriet, when we reach the bottom of the stairs, as she puts Nikki back into the play pen with her kitten and her twin brother. "I'm not too sure. I know that the wedding will be in London."

Harriet raises her eyebrow. "Obviously, Mac."

I let out a laugh. "Thanks." But what am I going to do? There's so much to do, I have no idea where to start. There's the cake, the food, the church, the reception hall, the flowers, the dresses, the tuxes… "Harriet, you are going to help me, right?" I ask. Okay, well more like beg.

Harriet laughs. "Of course I am. Mind you, I had some help with my wedding though."

"Who helped you plan it all? It certainly was beautiful." I tell her.

Harriet opens her mouth, but then closes it. She gives me a smile. "I would tell you, but then that certain person would kill me, and you," she laughs.

I frown, but follow her into the kitchen. Harriet stops right in front of me, causing me to almost bump into her. What is she doing? I move over to the side of her, and I have to bite my lip to keep from laughing.

"AJ Roberts!" Harriet growls.

AJ stops in his tracks, as he looks up from his little brother with a guilty look plastered all over his face. "Uh… yes?"

"Just what were you thinking - painting jam all over Jimmy's face!" Harriet says sternly. I put an unimpressed look on my face, while trying to keep myself from laughing. Jimmy looks up at us, a big smile on his purple face that's covered in jam.

"I want you to clean up this mess, and I want you to clean up your brother!"

"Yes mom…" he says, picking Jimmy up. Jimmy laughs happily, as AJ leads him up the stairs towards the kid's bathroom.

Harriet sighs beside me, as she walks over the sink, and soaks a cloth in warm water. "Do you need some help?" I offer. She glances around the room, and I'm guessing she's thinking the same thing I'm thinking - when boys make a mess, they really make a mess. The area around the where AJ was making his brother a masterpiece was covered with blueberry jam. I don't even wait for her to take me up on my offer, I just quickly grab a warm, damp cloth and walk over to where she started to clean.

In no time at all, the jam is off the floor, and our rags have turned purple. Luckily for us, AJ had just started to 'paint' Jimmy, so it wasn't that bad. Harriet stands up beside me, and sighs at our newly-shined kitchen floor. Grabbing my cloth, she takes it over to the basement door that's right beside the other entrance into the kitchen, and throws them down into a basket waiting at the bottom of the stairs.

"Well, it's a nice day outside. Nikki and Adam can play out in the grass." Harriet says, and I follow her into the living room.

The piano is beautiful, and I've seen AJ play it. Harriet's been doing an amazing job teaching them, although she won't play for us. Probably nerves, since Harriet's shy about that sort of thing. But I have heard from her mother that she does have a wonderful voice, because Harriet was 'forced' -has Harriet puts it- into singing lessons.

But it all paid off. AJ's going to be a really good pianist, even if he hates it now. If Harm and I have kids, Harm will teach them to play the guitar. We'll sit down after dinner near the fire place with a roaring fire in front of us. Our little girl will be sitting in my lap, as I brush her long dark hair. Our little boy will be playing the guitar with Harm, as we laugh and-

I stop myself. That won't happen. We're not going to have kids. And it's not that we won't have them, it's that we just _can__'t_.

_TBC . . . _

**A/N: You reviewers are awesome, I don't suppose you could work your magic again, could you?**


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